March 31, 1974

Today is Sunday. The Sabbath day, because of energy “crunch” and gas shortages our church schedules has now changed. Our priesthood meeting, Sacrament meeting and Sunday School are all scheduled together from 1-5 pm. As a consequence our attendance at Sacrament meeting has gone from 42% to 70%. Personally, I feel that it is wonderful because when we arise on Sunday morning we do not have the hustle we used to. We can meditate and prepare ourselves for the meetings. I am sure that the level of spirituality will increase considerably.

            Eric is now functioning as the Ward Financial Clerk. This week has been a bad week – We have been unable to get the ledger to balance. He has spent close to 30 hours, had to miss a budget dinner at his own home and stay up to 3 AM. I can understand and empathize over his frustration. It seems that no matter how old we are, we suffer over the problem and trial that our children experience. I went to God last night with a sick feeling in my heart and stomach which I have known very often. I realized how deeply I love Eric and Chris and their children and how precious they are to me. I also realize how our Father in Heaven must feel for us as we struggle to be righteous people and when we experience painful trials that bring added growth and stature.

            I feel to write about an incident that happened this past week. I do this because our relationships with people are not all “black and white”.

            I was approached by a young man with a family for money to continue his education. To me, his attitude is somewhat aggressive and overbearing. He acts like it would be a privilege for me to help him. I really don’t know but perhaps his attitude is influenced by the fact that his father holds a high office in the Stake and his wife is the granddaughter of a previous member of the 1st Presidency. To complicate things, I have had previous business dealing with his father. They were so adverse and unpleasant that I had resolved to have as little as possible to do with his family. In fact, the very name of the family “turns me off”. Now!! – I am approached by this young man in the crisis hour for financial support. When discussing this problem with Norma she pointed out to me the goodness of the mother and I recall a son of the family whom I taught in Seminary and for whom I developed special feelings. As a consequence we will do our best to help. Perhaps we are purposely put in such positions as this to purify our souls and purge ourselves of negative, destructive feelings towards others.